For the man who caused the harm, and is finally ready to stop running from it. No more managing her healing. No more half-truths. Three days of the work you should have done years ago.
Secure your spot
$500
That is the deposit that locks your place for the January Cave. Pay in full, or start with $500 and set up the rest on a plan with Coach Bear.
The October 2026 Kissimmee cohort is closed
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The October 2026 cohort in Kissimmee, Florida is closed for entry. The next Cave for Men is January 15 to 17, 2027, in Austin, Texas. Same three day intensive, same work. Apply above to hold your place.
Apply for the January Cave
Coach Bear reviews every application personally.
Investment
From $3,200 to $3,750
Travel & Arrival
Plan to arrive Thursday, January 14.
The house opens Thursday, January 14 after 2:00 PM, and the Cave begins Friday morning, January 15. Fly in Thursday so you arrive rested and ready, not depleted from a travel day. Departure is Sunday, January 17 by 2:00 PM. Booking your travel, flights, ground transportation to and from the airport, and any lodging outside the intensive dates, is your responsibility.
What The Cave Is
This is not therapy.
This is truth, grief, responsibility, and integrity. It's the work that has to happen before reconciliation is even possible. It's the work most men never do because no one ever made them do it, and because doing it alone is almost impossible.
The Cave is named for the place David ran to in 1 Samuel 22. Broken men, in debt, in distress, in conflict. Men with nothing left to defend. They gathered around a leader who had also fallen apart, and they came out as the mighty men who would later be named in 2 Samuel 23.
That's the arc. You arrive broken. You leave with a new name on your shoulders and a clear path home.
Scenes from a past Cave intensive
The Three Days
Thursday evening to Sunday afternoon.
You arrive Thursday and stop thinking about logistics until you leave. Every meal is covered, your room is ready, and each day is built to take you one layer deeper. Here is how the weekend moves.
Arrival
Thursday after 2:00 PMSettle in before we begin
Departure
Sunday by 2:00 PMHome with a clear path
THU
Thursday, January 14
Arrive and settle in
Doors open after 2:00 PM
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Doors open after 2:00 PM. Find your room, drop your bag, and breathe. The night is low and easy: a first meal together and a chance to meet the men you'll do this with before any of the hard work starts.
ArrivalFirst dinner together
FRI
Friday, January 15
Unmasking
Drop the act, get honest
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The first full day. We introduce ourselves for real, drop the act, and get honest in front of each other. This is where the pretending ends and the vulnerability that makes the rest of the weekend possible begins.
Meeting everyoneUnmaskingVulnerability
SAT
Saturday, January 16
The deep work
Identity, forgiveness, pride, safety
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The heaviest and most important day. We go into identity, who you really are underneath what you did, and into forgiveness. We lay down the pride that keeps a man defended, and we learn what it actually means to be safe and to make the people around you safe.
IdentityForgivenessLaying down prideBecoming safe
SUN
Sunday, January 17
Bringing it all together
Covenant, and depart by 2:00 PM
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We pull the weekend into something you can carry home: a clear path, a covenant in your own hand, and a brotherhood that doesn't end at the door. Departure is by 2:00 PM.
IntegrationCovenantDeparture by 2:00 PM
Who This Is For
Ten men. One room.
The Cave is intentionally small. Ten men maximum. That cap exists because the work requires it: there's no hiding in a room of ten, and there's no time wasted catching up the group when each man speaks.
You'll be in the room with men who, like you, have caused real harm and are no longer willing to be the version of themselves who caused it.
This is for you if
- You caused harm in your marriage and you're done managing her response to it
- You've apologized but you can feel that nothing has actually changed at the root
- You're tired of being the version of yourself who hurt the people you love
- You believe God can rebuild what you broke, but you need help carrying the weight
- You're willing to do work that will be uncomfortable, exposing, and worth it
This is not for you if
- You're looking for techniques to manage your wife's reaction to what you did
- You're not actually ready to take ownership without conditions
- You're hoping the Cave is a shortcut so you can avoid the longer work at home
- You're still actively engaged in the behavior that caused the harm
- You want a coach who will go easy on you
"I nearly destroyed my marriage through avoidance, escapism, and infidelity. I came back the long way, and most of that long way was alone. The Cave exists so the next man doesn't have to do it alone."
Coach Bear · Founder, Shifted Sight
Investment
$3,750
Three days of in-person work. Lodging. Meals. Materials. Coach Bear in the room for every minute of it. You choose your room when you're approved.
Private Room
$3,750
Your own room for the three days. Pay in full, or start with a $500 deposit and set up the rest with Coach Bear.
Shared Room, when open
$3,500 / $3,200
A bunk in the shared room, offered when it is open: $3,500 per person for a bottom bunk, $3,200 for a top bunk. Pay in full, or start with a $500 deposit.
Seats are held by payment only. Approval clears you to pay, but it does not hold a seat. The men who pay are the ones who are in, in the order the payments come. When you're approved, put down your payment to lock yours before it's gone.
Apply for the January Cave
You choose your room and how to pay after your application is reviewed
What's Included
Everything once you're in the room.
Once you arrive at the house, the Cave is fully held. Lodging, meals, materials, and the work itself are all covered. You show up with a bag. We handle the rest of the weekend.
1
Three days of in-person workSessions, exercises, and the full weekend arc, led by Coach Bear in the room.
2
Private or shared lodgingYour own private room, or a bunk in the shared room when it is open. You choose your room when you are approved.
3
All meals, every dayChef-prepared meals from Thursday dinner through Sunday. You will not plan or pay for a single meal.
4
MaterialsYour bag of rocks, your white stone, your covenant document, and everything that goes with the arc.
5
Brotherhood that lastsThe men you do this with stay in your corner. Private group chat. Quarterly check-ins.
Not included
Your flights, ground transportation to and from the airport, and any lodging outside the intensive dates are your responsibility to arrange and cover.
Questions, answered straight
FAQ
Why is the investment $3,750?+
Because the work is worth more than that and the cost is what it actually takes to do it well. Private or shared lodging, chef-prepared meals, a tiny cohort of up to fourteen men, and Coach Bear in the room from start to finish. The deeper answer: most men spend more than this on lawyers, hotels, and damage control after the marriage falls apart. The Cave is the version of that money spent before the marriage falls apart, on the version of yourself who can prevent it.
What if I can't pay in full up front?+
The deposit option is $500 down to lock your seat, and the balance is broken into a plan tailored to your cohort's start date. Full payment is required no later than one month before the intensive begins. We work out the specific schedule together after your application is reviewed.
What happens once I'm approved?+
Approval clears you to pay, but it does not hold a seat. Seats are held by payment only, so the men who pay first are the ones who are in. Put down your payment, either paid in full or the $500 deposit, to lock your place. Until you do, the seat stays open to whoever pays first.
Do I need to be a Christian to come?+
The Cave is faith-integrated. Scripture, prayer, and biblical framing are woven into the arc. You don't need to come in with a polished theology, but you should be ready for the work to be done in the open before God, not just in your own private psychology.
What if my wife wants me to go but I'm not sure?+
Then you're not ready. The Cave is for the man who has decided, on his own, that he is done being who he was. Coming because she wants you to is the same energy that caused the harm in the first place. Talk to Coach Bear first. He'll tell you straight whether to wait.
Is what I share here confidential?+
Yes. Each man signs a covenant on day one. Specifics never leave the room. Coach Bear models the same. The brotherhood that forms is sealed by the work, not by gossip.
What happens after the weekend?+
You return home with a covenant, an active group chat with the men from your cohort, and a clear path for the next ninety days. The Cave is the beginning of the work, not the end of it.
Your seat starts here
Apply for the January Cave
It takes about two minutes and costs nothing. Coach Bear reads every application himself. When you're approved, you choose your room and put down your $500 deposit to lock your place.
Up to 14 Men Per Cohort
Are you the one this is for?
Apply below. Coach Bear personally reviews every application and reaches out within a few days. There is no waitlist for the wrong fit, and no pressure for the right one.
Apply for the January Cave
Takes about 2 minutes
